The Wrong Mister

It is 2020. Guys are as difficult to figure out as the weather forecast of Texas. The weather app might tell you one thing... but the sky says another. In other words, damn near impossible to figure out. That has me wondering, do guys want the wifey type or the wrong missy? Or are they simply just the wrong mister?

As women we have to catch on to the wrong mister signals.

Wishy-washy guys are not it. He has got to go if he cant follow through when he says he is going to do something. Those guys are the most dangerous of all species. They will flake and then use their words to make you feel special to keep you holding on. Well not anymore. If a boy can't bother to give you the time of day unless you're giving him what he wants, then thank you, next.

Let me shed a little light on the subject of what the wrong mister wants. Baby girl, if he is only texting you past 12 a.m. then he just wants some a$$. DO NOT fall for it. He ain't too busy. The right mister will make time for you during the day, not just when he wants something.

Gals, listen to your gut feeling. Its like our super power. We can tell when another girl likes our man. We know the signs, because well we are women and know how women work. Now I'm not telling you to go full on crazy mode every time you have a feeling, because lets face it that is not attractive. However, if you keep having that same feeling then communicate it to your man. That is one sure way to see if you have the right mister. By the way he reacts to your concerns will say a lot about him. A man will listen and take your feelings seriously, a boy will belittle you and call you crazy. Then that same boy will turn around and get with the girl that you had a gut feeling about. That ladies IS the wrong mister.

Now lets pretend we are in a game of bullshit. You know the card game where you yell bullshit if you know/think someone is lying. Ya you know that game. So, whenever you hear, ""She is just a really good friend of mine," you will know exactly what to say. Usually when guys are in the circumstance where they have to say that sentence is when a certain girl friend of theirs does something that upsets us women. This could be getting too touchy with him, spending more time with him then you do, or tagging him on Instagram as #youthoughtb*tch, etc. The list could go on. The point is that if you bring it to his attention and he says he wont change the way things are because shes "just a good friend", then that is a red flag. The right man will do what it takes to reassure you that you're his girl. He will know that the grass isn't greener on the other side of the fence, it is greener where you water it. The wrong mister will continue to let things go on the way they are with that girl because he still just living for himself.

Priorities. We all have them. When you're single its great because all you have to think about is yourself. However, in a relationship it is important to realize you have now added another priority to your everyday life. The wrong mister wont make you a priority because he is still just living for himself. It's important to have your own hobbies and things you do without each other yes, but you can't let those things over shadow your relationship. Feeling like you come last to so many other things in someones life is a sure way to lose the person you have. Its called neglect people. If you truly love someone you don't neglect them. Going on dates and doing cute things for your girl is still a must even if you're 2 years in. Don't get into a relationship if you aren't willing to change up your priorities. Its as simple as that. If he isn't making you a priority then kick that wrong mister to the curb.

As women we were not put on this earth to fix all of the wrong misters problems. It is not your job to turn him into a man. It never works. Trust me. I have tried and have failed every time. It doesn't matter how great of a woman you are. If he doesn't want to change then he is not going to change. A good man can still become better with a great woman by his side. A boy needs to figure out how to become a man by himself before he can be the right mister for you. Most of the time a boy thinks he is ready for a relationship, when in fact he is not. He sees all of the great attributes that a woman has and he wants those for himself. He wants a loyal woman by his side, but he isn't willing to give that loyalty in return. He wants a gorgeous woman to say he has one but then wants to fool around with girls who aren't half of what she is. He wants a woman who is ambitious and goal oriented, but doesn't want to put forth the effort to get to his goals. He wants a woman who would go out of her way to make sure he has everything he needs, and then wont even give her the bare minimum required in a relationship. The wrong mister wants what he lacks in himself. Do not give him the parts of yourself that you worked hard to build up. He should have to work hard to become equally the man as you are a woman. The right man will equal you in every single way.

Now-a--days guys are scared of the wifey type. Boys want easy and comfortable.They will run away from the parts of themselves that they aren't willing to change to be worthy of her or they will tear her down to their level. Do not allow him to break down the woman you've built yourself into to turn him into a man. A man wants a woman that will push him to be a better man. The problem is that there are too many wrong misters and not enough men.

So listen up ladies, if you don't take anything else from what was said above just remember this.... The wrong MISTER might be the one that has a hold on your heart but don't let that tear you a part from the woman you are from the start!

#thewrongmister #blog #Chey&theCity #sexcolumn